Worst Jokes Ever
Q. What's red and crawls up your leg?
A. A homesick abortion.
How do you punish Helen Keller? Just move the couch.
Q: Why did the fly go to the hospital?
A: For the doctor to make it get "butter!"
My "choco" is too "late" for lunch.
Sad to think about legend O.G. Mudbone being no longer with us.
I’m only curious how they closed his casket.
How do you get your appeal for rape charges accepted? Say you were expressing your desire for a woman, which is protected under the Constitution in freedom of expression.
Did you know the Bible has a passage about killing babies by smashing them against rocks?
That's probably because microwaves hadn't been invented yet.
I was crying while my dad was cutting onions in the kitchen. Onions was such a good dog.
Lol, I have no life :)
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they cannot find home.
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
There is a Mexican, white guy, a Jew, and a Black man on top of the Empire State Building.
First, the Mexican and the Jew throw themselves off of the building saying, "This is for my people!"
Then the Black man is next up to jump and says, "This is for my people!"
And throws the White man off of the building.
Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted to get to the other side.
When you have to get your prostate checked and you can feel the cold rubber of the glove, but you realize both the doctor's hands are on your shoulders.
Q: What’s the hardest thing about fucking a dude with a dildo?
A: Making sure he doesn’t wake up.
Yo mama so fat, she sunk the Titanic.
You can assume a horse is called a great jumper when the horse’s name is “Polo Neck”.
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
Apparently I'm not allowed home after house fires, but the neighbors, their house burnt lovely.
What's the slowest train in the world? A slow coach!