Worst Jokes Ever
Roses are red, grass is greener.
When I think of you, I play with my weiner.
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
Why do orphans like to play GTA?
To be wanted.
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
He didn't know where home was.
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
Line (DYM 105)
Did you know curing boredom is quite simple?
For instance, you could pretend to be an apple by tying a rope around your neck for a stem.
A woman goes into labor with her child. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of childbirth to the father. He asks if it is ok to use the new device. The couple agrees, and so he turns the pain to the father to 10%. The man feels nothing.
They then bump it up to 20%. He still feels nothing, then his friend calls and he is groaning. He said he was having cramps, so the husband tells the doctor, "Doc, turn it up to 40%!" So he does, and his friend throws up, so he said, "Doc, turn it up to 100%!" and his friend dies.
I like mangoes.
Hope everyone is having a good day! ❤️
Why was six afraid of seven?
Seven was a registered six offender.
I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.
Jokes are like food.
Not everyone gets it.
Why can't orphans have a big bag of chips?
Because they're family sized!
What do you call a very rude bird? A mockingbird.
Gallons (DYM 113).
You're walking one day and a little kid, about 5-6 years old, comes up to you asking, "What's a condom?" You have to give that child the wrong answer, what would you tell them? Comment on what you would tell them.
What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? About 120 pounds. ;D