Today Jokes

Today I Asked My Sis To Take Out The Trash And I Shoved Her Outside

How long is it

Finally my father came early from office today, I am very happy

fired from job

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I did have a good time today I did

I did a walk today but it was good for Tyler I was just a good time to sleep good I got yyy night and a night

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What is your car 🚘 was your time today after I had dinner 🍴 night and night sleep 😴 night is it a night for you and a dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night was the snow ⛄️ I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🥘

WHY IS THE SUN RED TODAY?Turned Red Today. Here's Why. As an enormous Atlantic storm batters Ireland, a related phenomenon is turning heads further east over in the United Kingdom. ... Just like the way sunsets are sometimes red, excess particles in the atmosphere can change the color of the sun in the daytime.

Watch BNHA season 4 today

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I did a walk today but it was good for me and my car and a walk today

My pansexual son was asked to form a sentence with a word "Carry" on his zoom class earlier on today and he said "Pessi was carried by Iniesta and Neymar to his Mickey Mouse UCL" .He received a standing ovation. Children are our hope and I'm proud of the education system!

This is Riley abortion clinic yesterday's loss is today's sauce.

What did the dog say when he came home from a long shift at work? Today was ruff.

What is the difference between the human rights act of a home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk

Mrs. Kadie- I heard about this Mr. Beast Video about Veggie Burgers. I hope that you didn't trick me again Mr., Beast- Today we're gonna be eating a Hot tender Burger Mrs. Kadie- OMG he didn't say vegan Viewers- HAHAHA WE TRICKED YOU Mrs. Kadie- That's it Mr. Beast we're gonna pour Blood on your face Mr. Beast& Chandler- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!1!

today my idiot brother screamed"ahhhhh im dead!' but it wasn't really, so i d3cded to make it a reality until my sister came.............................

AND HELPED ME! - for once but then two minutes later my mom showed up, we k!lled him right infront of her and she screamed! "DONUTS AND PIZZA FOR YPU AND MORE IF YOU GO TO MRS ROBERTS HOUSE AND SAY HI AND BYE TO DADDY!!!!! and she hands us both a sharp tool and i say what about tommy??!!! arn't u MAD!!!!!!! then she replied who's THAT!!??? COZ HE AINT MINE HIS NAME IS TOMMY, TOMMY ROBERTS. so then me and my sister visit mrs ROBERTS AND SHE SAID OH THIS ISN'T ANYTHING IMPORTANT GO HOME! so then my sister nd i say hi! and do a countdount aftr that my nike white jumper had turned red! IT WAS A MUCH BETTER COLOUR , MUM SEEMED TO APROVE AS WELL!😊😊😊 but then the police question us where daddy was so then mom said....................... oh he's moved on! so then the police officer was like ahem ma'm where! SO THEN I BELLOWED.......................... UP - UR -A##. And we got let off the hook, then we moved oh and we k!lled the cop 2 and oh did i meantion we HAD a maid, and a landlord and a cat but they were all 2 annoying so we got rid of them and now our new backyard is very smellyyy and i dont think there is enoff space to put muummy anymore so now i dont think sissy will fit either🧐 i will ask my neibour nessy she'll obviously say YES or ill........................................

ok like for part two☺☺☺