Time jokes
"Shout out to entity...welcome to hell!"
"Every time I see your icon I vomit lol."
"Get a life... hey I'm violet olivegarden how can I help you if you need me to disc someone ill help..."
2 7 73 53.
I'll give you time, figure it out.
How many times does it take to make an octopus laugh?
Tentacles!
Why did the clock go out to the gazebo? To spend some time out.
A lady sees a doctor about a tummy ache. After her check up, the Doctor said, “Looks like you’ll be needing nappies in about 9 months time.”
The lady asks, “Am I pregnant?” To which the Doctor replied, “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Five more days.
What did the blonde say when someone says, "Your baby is so cute?"
"For the last time, I don't want to sign up my child for Tindergarten just yet!"
"We make sexy time, yes, and every night I tap that."
Long time since I made a joke, huh? I used a Time Machine to make this one.
What time is it if you sprain an ankle or an arm?
Time to go to the doctor! 🥼
What is an orphan's favorite time with his family?
"Me time."
"Have fun at school night" is what?
The future, the present, and the past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.
What do you call a winter time contact?
A Santa Claus.
Planes shouldn't have free Wi-Fi. Why? Because the last time they had free Wi-Fi, well here's what happened...
On September eleventh 2001, (children scream).
I poo 11 times a day.
What time is it when dogs are an appointment? Time to scream!
Wanna hear a joke about measurement... never mind, it would take too long.
How do terrorists feed their kids?
"Here comes the airplane... and then the second!"
Time flies like an arrow.
Fruit flies like a banana.