Time jokes
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? Because there is no Mother's or Father's Day.
Prince, are you really gay, because I love you with all my heart and pray for you all the time!
PLEASE CHOOSE ME INSTEAD! :(
Did you hear Stephen Hawking has a new book out?
It's about time!
One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."
A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"
Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."
Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"
Hey Gwen, next time you're online can you go to "son jokes".
I commented back to you and portory.
Memes
Once upon a time, there was a woman named Sarah who woke up one morning to find her husband and his wheelchair missing. She searched high and low, but they were nowhere to be found. Desperate to find them, she put up posters all over town offering a reward.
"I love you, you too. I-eeeeeee was the night. Time is it when you you get a typical sleep night. Is oooooooo, is it a walk home was the night night and a tree is it?"
What time is it when you get home, can you walk walk home and walk walk home to get a car? I love you, you're the night!
The Past, Present & Future walked into a bar.
It was tense!
What do you say to a clock?
"What time is it?"
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
Where are you right now?
Looking at a fake joke? You are a waste of time and space.
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
What is your favorite time of day?
What time is it when you say "bad day?"
Guys, you need to ketchup with the time.
The longer the relationship, the longer the breakup will hurt you. Better break up now ooo.🤣
Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?
Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.
It's a little known fact that Helen Keller was against teaching deaf people sign language and thought they should be forced to use oral language.
Weird.
Last time I forced somebody into oral, I got arrested.
You know I wish life was shorter?
I want it over.
Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?
Because they took a day off.