Time jokes
I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.
I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.
The longer the relationship, the longer the breakup will hurt you. Better break up now ooo.🤣
Guys, you need to ketchup with the time.
If I had a dollar for every time a rap hater made an intelligent statement, I’d be more broke than the rap haters.
It's a little known fact that Helen Keller was against teaching deaf people sign language and thought they should be forced to use oral language.
Weird.
Last time I forced somebody into oral, I got arrested.
It's that time of year again. 🎄🎅🤶🎄
Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?
Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.
Yo mama so old that she knew "The Outsiders" when they were "The Insiders."
What happens if you look in the mirror and say fentanyl 3 times? You'll see Derek Chauvin kneeling on George Floyd's neck.
One time, I worked at 3 jobs at the same time and my boss said it was illegal.
It got too out of hand and I got spanked.
Why was 6 afraid of 9?
Because 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Happy New Year!
One time, I was making a caramel apple.
When I mistook 1 gallon of caramel for 1 camel!
You know I wish life was shorter?
I want it over.
Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?
Because they took a day off.
The last time I ever made a joke was just now.
One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.
After standing in line staring at McDonald's menu for 17 minutes,
Me: "Okay, I'm ready. Can you help me not be sad all the time?"
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
When you don't wear earrings for a long time, the hole can close, and it hurts so much when you want to put it back. 🙄🙄 😁😁😁🤣
Yo mama is so stupid, she had to retake preschool 20 times!
I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!