Think jokes

What do you think about the game "Fortnite?"

Shit.

Person 1: "I love KFC."

Person 2: "Yeah, me too!"

Person 1: "How many have you gotten?"

Person 2: "How am I supposed to remember how many buckets of chicken I have ordered!?"

Person 1: "Chicken? What chicken? What do you think KFC stands for?"

Person 2: "Kentucky Fried Chicken?"

Person 1: "What? I thought it meant kidnapping foster children."

Person 2: "BLOODY WHATT??"

A man (Ameenya Sheed) texts another man (Bob) and said,

"Hi, I'm Ameenya Sheed."

Bob: "You're not in my shed because I don't have one, but I have a garage. I don't think you're in there."

Who thinks I should keep bothering Gwen?

Comments good or bad!

Roses are red.

Grass is green.

I think of you sucking my peen.

If all the class are straight but you think that someone is hiding that he's gay, you're an investiGAYtor.

I'm gonna make a documentary about meth-addicted prostitutes.

I think I'll call it "Whores on Ice."

I don’t think 9/11 jokes are funny... they just crash and burn.

I think they are New York Jets fans and the Jets QB helped them... That's why one of them was off target.

What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it’s the "R," but it’s actually the "C".

So, I was in the church the other day, raping this woman, when she screamed, 'Please! Think of my children!' I said, 'Ooo, you kinky bitch.'

I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.

How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?

Three drunk guys entered a taxi.

The taxi driver knew that they were drunk, so he started the engine and turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination." The first guy gave him money, and the second guy said, "Thank you." The third guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked, thinking the third drunk knew what he did. But then he asked, "What was that for?" The third guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"

I went on holiday to the coast the other day, and I saw a shark.

I was alright, but I don't think my feet were.

One day, Billy's teacher asked him, "I heard your mom had a baby. What did she have?"

Billy paused and thought for a moment and said, "I think she had a bicycle."

"Now Billy, you know that your mom didn't have a bicycle. What did she have?"

"Maybe it was a tricycle."

"Billy, don't stand there and lie to me. We're going to the principal's office right now!"

The teacher grabbed Billy and escorted him to the principal's office and explained what happened. The principal looked sternly at Billy and said, "Stop lying, Billy. You know your mom didn't have a bicycle or a tricycle. What did your mother have?"

Billy looked up, fear in his eyes and said, "Well, maybe she had a go-cart."

That was more than enough. "I'm calling your mother right now!"

Soon, Billy's mother arrived at the principal's office. "It seems that Billy has decided to start telling lies. His teacher asked him what you recently had, and he said a bicycle, then a tricycle, then a go-cart!"

Billy's mother teared up, and through her sobs, replied to the principal and teacher, "No. Sadly, I had a miscarriage."

Billy sat up straight and said, "I KNEW that damn thing had wheels!"

You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.

Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.

I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.

Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.

A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.

I learned that a strangler was targeting me.

All I could think was, "You’ve got to be choking me!"