They Jokes

Orphans can get away with anything really bad at school, because they can't be sent home for it.

If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

Q. Why were the Twin Towers so mad?

A. Because they ordered pepperoni pizza, but they only got plane.

Orphan kids only play GTA5 so they can be wanted.

Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?

Because they have no body to go with.

A flowchart with the title "Should you buy crack" has a series of questions leading to the decision of buying crack or not. The flowchart starts with the question "Do you have money?", if no, then "Not for crack", if yes, then, a box says "Blasphemy!". After that, questions about job, payment, possession, and finally whether you have a warm hole leading all the way to "Buy some crack"

What do ICE and Mexican drug cartels both have in common?

They both kidnap Canadian women!

The couple next door made a porn film.

They don’t know it yet.

Q: Why can't orphans be gay?

A: They have no one to call "daddy."

Why is American bad at Clash of Clans?

Because they already lost 2 towers.

People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse.

They can stay in their living room.

Why are birds good at social media?

Because they "tweet" all the time!?

What's the difference between Jedi and a rapist?

Nothing, they both use the Force to get what they want.

How are laundry and Michael Jackson related?

They both got bleached!

Did you hear about the flood at the circus? Lots of people drowned, and there were two clowns that survived and two nuns still in the audience.

The two clowns ran over to the two nuns, and each one put a nun on his shoulder. Then they waded out of the big top, up to their waists in the rapid, turbulent water. As they were reaching dry land, one clown said to the other, "If you ask me, this is virgin on the ridiculous!"

Three people explored the jungles, one was from France, one from Britain, and the other from America.

While exploring, they were captured by the tribe living there. The tribesmen told the three, "You three have invaded our territory, so we must kill you and use your bodies to create canoes. However, we aren't that heartless, so we'll let you choose your deaths."

So the French guy asked for a gun, pointed to his head, and said "Viva la France!" and shot himself. The Britain guy requested poison and said, "For the Queen!" and drank the poison. Lastly, the American asked for a spoon. The tribesmen were confused but still gave him the spoon. When the American got the spoon, he started stabbing himself, "Try make a canoe out of this one!"

Muslims love to exaggerate, that's why they always blow things up.

If you're ever bored, rape an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

The mother and her daughter went to the store. After they arrived, the daughter looked around and ran off somewhere. The mother realized this and took off looking for her. After a while, she found her tugging on a black man. The mother asked, "What are you doing?" and the daughter replied, "I wan't the chocolate!"

I was working at a check-in station for a flight to Riyadh when suddenly I was approached by Benzema, Kante, and Neymar!

At first I was very surprised and curious, so I asked them why they decided to play in the Saudi Pro League and not MLS where GOAT Messi plays. They all smiled and happily replied: "Don't you know, the legendary bench warmer PRISTIANO PENALDO plays there!"

Now I fully understood what they meant! They know that Pristiano is already finished, so winning trophies will be easy for them. I smiled and happily let them through.