Theft jokes
Q: How do you know if a gang of Chinese people robbed your house?
A: All the rice is gone.
"Hi, this is Dave's orphanage—you make it, we take it."
My girlfriend dumped me, so I stole her wheelchair. She came crawling back!
Did you hear about the guy who was arrested for stealing luggage? Unfortunately, he lost his case.
Why do orphans like stealing things?
They wanted to have company.
Why did the orphan rob a bank?
To be wanted.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
Because he/she wanted to be wanted!
Me and my girlfriend broke up, so I took her wheelchair, and she came crawling back.
Once a naked woman robs a bank, but sadly, no one can remember her face...
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
A kid named Billy gets his lunch money stolen at school. The bully later gets his allowance, the lunch money, and his wallet taken by his father.
The father then gets all the money taken from him by the bully’s grandfather along with his own wallet. The grandfather then takes the money and gets it stolen by Billy along with his own wallet.
I, for one, give President Joe Biden my full support, and anything else he can find in my previously rented gym locker. 🤣
Someone stole my balls :(
Yo mama's so old, she walked out of a museum and the alarm went off.
Roses are red, violets are blue, most of your jokes are stolen, is not original to you.
(To a thief) If you like taking things, how about you take my life?
Bank owner: If you want to start a bank account, I need your name.
Guy: Robin
Bank owner: Your last name?
Guy: Debank
Bank owner: Robin Debank?
Guy: Put your hands up and give me all the money!
Orphans can be a robber if they want because their parents won't be disappointed.
My grandpa has the heart of a lion,
and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
Why did the robber take a shower before his robbery?
So he could make a clean getaway!