The 70+ Best Steal Jokes

To become a licensed, airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.

What do you get when cayden steals your sandwich a nuckle sandwich

If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?

10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.

why is the thief so good at basketball? because he can shoot, steal, and run

What do you call a cow that can't milk

A failure!

I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van if you touch my van I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan if you steal ice cream I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine

Why are you dumb? Because can’t found LOLA

why was the dog stealing shingles?

he wanted to be a woofer

Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church. You follow him in and under their breath it sounds like somebody says you steal and you say in your mind knowing you have before I’m sorry then somebody caughs and under their breath it sounds like they say again you steal so you whisper quietly I’m sorry... ...then somebody in German says shoot that son of a bitch

Why was the DJ banned from the supermarket? -- He was stealing all the samples.

I always use chloroform when stealing a child

When you push your grandma out of her wheelchair and steal it. “They see me rollin’, they hating”

🗿🗿🗿

Why can't Mexicans play Uno? Because they steal all of the green cards.

What do you do when a French kid steals your pencil?Load your MP-40 and tell him that you give him a history lesson on WWII.

Why are Mexicans good at Uno?

They always steal the green card.

Well.

me: i'm going to steal your heart

her: omg thats so romantic!!

me, an organ trafficker: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut. We got his EpiPen to help him when penaldo appeared because he heard the word PEN. He tried stealing the pen but I said "no pens for you". And “brentford”.He cried and ran away. Shame on you penaldo the fraud.