To become a licensed, airline pilot requires 1,500 hours (two years) of training. But it only takes 10 seconds to steal the pilot’s jacket and hat.
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
why is the thief so good at basketball? because he can shoot, steal, and run
What do you get when cayden steals your sandwich a nuckle sandwich
why was the dog stealing shingles?
he wanted to be a woofer
Why was the DJ banned from the supermarket? -- He was stealing all the samples.
I am the ice cream man running over fat kids with my van if you touch my van I’ll smack you in the face with a frying pan if you steal ice cream I’ll shoot you in the face with a fudge machine
Jesus shows up and says you’ve got to go to church. You follow him in and under their breath it sounds like somebody says you steal and you say in your mind knowing you have before I’m sorry then somebody caughs and under their breath it sounds like they say again you steal so you whisper quietly I’m sorry... ...then somebody in German says shoot that son of a bitch
Why do people not play uno with Mexicans... because they are always stealing the green cards
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
What's the difference between a amateur thief and a professional thief?
The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, "Sign here please."
To the guy who stole my depression medication, I hope you're happy
When me and my friend went to the market, my friend tried to scan my arm and I asked her what she was doing and she answered "Oh I had to buy you so I don't steal you"
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
me: i'm going to steal your heart
her: omg thats so romantic!!
me, an organ trafficker: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
When you push your grandma out of her wheelchair and steal it. “They see me rollin’, they hating”
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
When the police caught him stealing the batteries he got immediately charged !
My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut. We got his EpiPen to help him when penaldo appeared because he heard the word PEN. He tried stealing the pen but I said "no pens for you". And “brentford”.He cried and ran away. Shame on you penaldo the fraud.
POV:someone stole micheal jacksons baby: he he stole my bab he he
