That jokes

Pressure

I hope you never find out whether that pressure in your ass is a fart or a shit.

Hairline

Your hairline is so long that when I put it on email, it didn't send, which is ETHAN BRIDEWATER.

Orphan

Teacher: Anyone missing?

Orphan: My parents.

Teacher: Something that is real, kid.

Orphan: My family.

Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!

Mama

Yo mama so fat that every time she takes a swim, the Arctic sinks by a mile!

Emo

At school I am always called emo.

Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.

Adoption

Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted!

Seed

What's the code thing on Minecraft that decides the world generation?

Seed?

Seedeeznuts!

Friend

A friend of mine told me something that I cannot forget, and I am now traumatized to hell. The next day a kid was set for an amber alert that looked exactly like my DEAR friend! :)

Mom

Your mom is so ugly that even Medusa turned to stone from looking at her!

Ex

When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.

Space

Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.

Drug

I always say no to drugs, but considering that I'm talking to them right now, I probably already said yes.

Fat

You are so fat that when you go out to check your letterbox, it measures 8 on the Richter scale.

Sex

Haven't had sex since I got out of jail; although sex in jail wasn't that great, either.

Orphan

Eminem: "He don't even know his own father." Orphans: Dang, wish I could listen to that. Eminem: At least you have a rap God to call father.

Shooter

I think it was wrong for that school shooter to end his life at the scene.

He could have done some good by becoming some lonely lifer's bottom.

Mirror

You're so ugly that if you looked in the mirror, you would walk into the light.