That jokes

What do you call a person that is both Black and Hispanic and was born on Wednesday? Miérkoolaids.

My uncle died in 9/11. He was in the plane that crashed in the field.

You ever notice that the USA could be a part of Russia?

RUSSIA US A

So, if Russia was the motherland and Germany was the fatherland, what does that mean?

The Western Front is domestic violence.

What did the baby cow say to the mommy cow when he saw a hamburger?

"Mommy, is that Uncle Joe?"

Yo hairline so put back that you could put 10 big size ramen noodles there.

John Cabot was the first to explore the Coast of Labrador. After he left, he realized that he had forgotten something and had to go back to get whatever it was. This made him the first Labrador Retriever.

If I had a genie grant me wishes, I wouldn't wish for a million pounds. I'd just wish that every time I buy something I just have the right amount of money in my pocket at the time.

I have a penis.

How's that for a fucking joke? It's not a joke. It's terrible.

500 thumbs down and I'll lop off my dick with a razor.

What does a person that’s high and Helen Keller have in common?

Both stare off into space.

What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?

They get set free.

Q: What did the iceberg say to the Titanic?

A: I'd hit that.

Yo mama so dumb that when she saw the "log in" page on her computer, she went and put a log in it.

A boy and girl in high school started dating for a while and things were going so well that the girl decided to invite the boy on a weekend trip. She said, "I want you to come spend the weekend at our lakehouse and meet my parents. While we're there, I'd also like to take our relationship to the next level." "I'm there," the boy replied.

The boy was so excited that he ran straight to the pharmacy to pick up some protection. He walked up to the pharmacist and told him about his weekend to come and said he needed some condoms. The pharmacist asked, "Do you want the 3 pack, 6 pack, or family sized 24 pack?" The boy replied, "I plan on getting busy all weekend. I'm not gonna stop pounding her till I'm black and blue. Give me the family pack." "Sure thing," said the pharmacist.

That weekend the boy went to the lakehouse and the whole family was sitting down at the dinner table to pray. The girl's father asked the boy to say grace. The boy prayed and prayed. Almost ten minutes went by. Finally, the girl leaned over to the boy and said, "You never told me that you were so religious." The boy replied, "You never told me that your dad was a pharmacist."

One day in my class, we were having that good snack, and one of my classmates choked on a Cheerio. One small, single, Cheerio!

What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?

One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

Brrr, it's fucking cold outside, aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh, how about the latest phone!

Who me? Oh, I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!

I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.

What can you give a white person that you can't give to a black person?

A black eye.