That jokes
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
Did you know that an orphan can take a selfie and a family photo at the same time?
What is a pizza that an orphan can’t have?
A family pizza.
The Queen: "I've had a few medical problems this year. I'm so old that my pussy is haunted!"
During Covid, lockdown went on for so long that even the agoraphobics got cabin fever.
Memes
What is an owl that wears armor?
Prince, do you love that girl Gwen more than me? Remember when you were at my house?
How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.
If you ever get chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that.
I told my therapist you are too fat and ugly to date grown men. Then she asked me, "You wanna give a judgemental reaction about that?" I said, "Okay, you smell rat pee on somebody's cock."
Say "traffic," and replace "r" with "h." It sounds like... that thicc.
One man said, "Do you need 20 bucks?"
The other said, "Do you have that many?"
What do you call an alligator that likes donuts? A donutator!
What is the difference between a human being and a tree tree house that is a tree tree house that is a tree tree house that is a tree tree 🌳?
Orphan: I want to kill my parents.
Random kid: I don’t think you have the facilities to do that, big man.
A dad and his son walk out to the middle of the woods armed only with a shovel and a lantern.
Son: "Dad, it's creepy out here!"
Dad: "You're complaining? I'm the one that has to leave the woods alone!"
Sarcastic Doctor: Tell me.
Guy: I have leukemia in the brain.
Sarcastic Doctor: That doesn't concern me.
Did you hear about the astronaut that stepped in gum and got stuck?
He got stuck in orbit! Hehhehe.
Me in my dream: What a good day! *rumble* Ooh! What was that?
I wake up and I find myself on the floor.
The village people said that they need their idiot back; you better get going!