That jokes
What did one ass cheek say to the other?
"Blimey, what's that smell coming from the corridor?"
What’s a 5 letter word that starts with a ‘P’ that girls love to get their hands on? 😏
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?
Call me fat? You call me fat because you think that you’re pretty, but you ain’t. You’re just a musty, dusty, rusty Cardi B.
Stan says shut the f**k up or sit your ass down on that b***h chair!
Your hairline is so long that your mother could not brush your hair.
Charlene's hairline was so far back that she was practically bald and fat.
I'm so poor that they let me buy the entire store! For $0...
"Chelsea is the most consistent team.
One win in August, one win in September, and one win in October; it's just like a menstrual cycle.
If they don't win in November, just know that they're pregnant." 😅
1, 2, 3, A, B, C, D, and there's a D in it and there's also a 3. That's how long your D is!
I met Lebron James, and he was so bald at the time that I could count his hairs.
And that's 1 hair and maybe 2.
What's the only thing that doesn't change in Alabama?
The last names after marriage!
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
Yo mama so ugly that she gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
Why are orphans so fond of shadows?
They're the only thing that accompanies them always.
Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"
The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."
A man is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door.
He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.
He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there's a knock at the door.
He opens it and sees the same snail.
The snail says, "What was that all about?"
One day I went to talk to my friend.
"Hi John!" I said.
No response.
"Oh, yeah."
I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.
"Hope that helps!"
Why can’t mental hospitals have Halloween?
Because the patients thought the pumpkins were them. I tried.
Roses are red, violets are blue, people think that you’re fat, until they saw your mom.