That jokes

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Forehead

Your forehead is so big that I can’t even see your hairline, and your stupid forehead face.

Dick

What do you call a dick that doesn't fit in an asshole?

A misfit.

Orphan

Peter: *curses*

Sam: Wow, do you kiss your mom with that mouth?

Peter: Jokes on you, I don't have a mom.

Tony: *having a heart attack* AFSJDHFKJJD Peter, we talked about this!!!

Life

Hi Gwen, how is life!

A. Bad, lame, and suckish.

B. Good, awesome, and you are loved!

C. Perfect!

I'm guessing that your life is NOT B nor C! Man, you're such an asshole!

Mamma

Your mamma is so fat that even a North Korean missile would have competition.

Santa

My Friend: Why does Santa look like that?

My 15 Year Old Friend: He has secateurs cancer...

Me: I heard it's because he comes once a year.

*Everyone Looks at me*

Dwarf

What do you call a dwarf that fell into a cement mixer?

A wee hard man.

Speed Bump

You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?

Butt

Gumball: What's that? Is it a twig?

Banana Joe: No.

Darwin: Is it a leaf?

Banana Joe: No.

Gumball: What is it then?

Banana Joe: It's my BUTT!!!

Police

What happened to the police that crossed the road?

They solved a murder involving the nut case.

Nut

Brother: Your nuts!

Sister: What do you mean? You're the one that has the nuts!

Girl

It's this girl named Deaf, what a weird name, but I know that 'cause I was ear hustling.

But anyway, everytime I call her, she doesn't answer. I wanna clap some cheeks tonight, how could she hate me when she don't know me?

Bathroom

I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!

Sister

A girl looked in the fridge. She got mad that somebody ate the last ice cream cone. She ran into her sister's room and said, "This is why you're fat!" Then fell down the stairs. Good thing she had that belly roll to save her.

Mom

Your mom is so fat that she thought Eminem is a candy.

Game

Random words in my keyboard:

The most annoying part of this game has always been that the players don’t know how much time it takes to get to the table before you start playing them.

Orphan

What happened when a kid bullied an orphan?

The orphan said, "I’m going to tell my mom!"

Bully: "I wanna see your mom!"

Narrator: At that moment, he knew he messed up.

This was my friend's joke he wanted me to post;)