That jokes

Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!

What do you call a hippo that lays eggs? A eggoppotimos.

Having cockroaches in the house is a sign that you've food.

These things are like Ugandan girls, they hate poverty.

Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!

I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.

Yo momma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her.

Yo mama so fat that if she didn't eat for a day, there would be enough food to feed Africans for 500 years.

Why is there only a glory hole in the handicapped stall in some public men's restrooms?

Because a gay man that is not physically handicapped can't receive a blow job from a gay man that is physically handicapped under the handicapped stall.

Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.

Your mama is so fat that when she went to run in a yellow jumpsuit, the kids thought they missed the school bus.

What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?

Panera Sed!

Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

Shut up with that Vegeta looking hairline!

You're so fat that people say you're the biggest bird!

Your hairline is so curved that McDonald's hired you to be their "M."

We are coming out with a Whopper that is similar to a priest because it also has its meat between 5-year-old buns.

Roses are red, violets are blue.

Is that what you think? You have no clue, you fool!

Were you born on the highway? That is where most accidents happen.

Question: Did you know that "diarrhea" is hereditary?

Answer: It "runs" in your jeans!