"Um, honey, I'm glad you're done, but um, WHO KICKED OUR BABY'S ASS?! I'M PRETTY SURE FACES DON'T BEND THAT WAY!!"
That Jokes
"Dick, you're fired."
"I'd buy that for a dollar."
The DNA told the tailor that he couldn't find his genes.
Déjà Vat: the feeling that you’ve heard that bad joke before.
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?
A farmer told me that he wanted a couple of acres, so I punched him in the teeth.
What do you call a goldfish that got third place? A bronze fish.
What do you call a fish that can use a katana?
A salmon-rai.
Yo mama so fat that when she sits down, global warming starts.
I think that church is super burning 🥵.
Angelina Jolie was married to Brad Pitt...
Does that make her a "Brad Nailer", and him a "Jolie Jumper"?
El, can you grab me that bow?
If your shirt isn't tucked into your pants, does that mean your pants are tucked into your shirt?
How names were named.
"I have to go because my tailor is at the gym where he will chase coal before dawn."
"SAY THAT AGAIN. SO MANY GOOD NAMES!"
If I agreed with Leo, then that wouldn’t solve anything. It would just make BOTH of us dumb.
Yo mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his fingers, she was still there.
Your buzz cut is so bad that the bees buzz around it!
What does it mean when there is a man in your bed, gasping for breath and saying your name?
It just means that you didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
Does that dick match that forehead? 👀
