That jokes
Sans: Zzzzzzzz
Papyus: SANS WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it dude?
Papyus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
Papyus: Grrrrr....
Sans: Oh come on that was a real RIBTICKLER.
People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids.
I don't think that's a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies.
What's worse than that?
The baby at the bottom of the pile is still alive.
What's worse than that?
The baby at the bottom of pile is eating its way out.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, girls would find me attractive.
A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."
Our Deaf Friend
A man opened a snail farm.
He said that it is a slow-moving business.
What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about?
Anonymouse.
A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
Wanna hear a funny joke? Well, that was why you were here... Here's the joke: Your life :)
Yo mama so ugly that when she was born, the doctor looked at her face, then at her butt and said, "Twins!"
Kobe would still be alive if he would have gone to jail for raping that girl.
What do you call a blonde in a freezer?
Her parents called her Cindy, so we should probably continue calling her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
My sisters ask me, "Are you really a virgin?" I say, "That's nun of your business!"
When I was a kid, I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
An orphan made an Instagram. He did not know what that symbol was on the bottom left hand corner.
There's two types of emo people:
1. People that cut side to side.
2. And people that cut up and down.
The most efficient is up and down.
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never eat anything that is family size.
- I think you're EGGcellent.
+ Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you're a EGGxtraordinary comedian.
- Really? Are you done yet?.
+ Are you kidding? I have a DOZEN of them.
Freddie Mercury was on top of the music world. That's only the 2nd thing he was a top in.