Technology jokes
One day my ex-best friend lied about his computer dying when he left the call and watched YouTube.
Stephen Hawking did not die; he deleted himself.
Why can’t orphans build computers?
They don’t know where to put the motherboard.
The only reason Stephen Hawking died is because he broke his charger.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
Error.
Q: What does a microwave and an M1 Garand have in common?
A: They both go “ping” when they’re done.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”
666 + 420 + 911 + 21 = ?
Do it in calculator.
What is the butt’s favorite computer?
The Tushiba.
*Enter password*
"ScoobyDoo"
"Password must contain special character."
"ScoobyDooFeaturingBatman"
Hi, I did not get your text. I texted you when I texted you. You are not [responding].
Your mom is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He tried to download a free version of Windows.
How did Stephen Hawking die? His wife needed to charge her iPhone.
A girl named Rebecca was friends with a guy called Fi. One day, Fi hit Rebecca, and Rebecca lost service.
Rebecca said to Fi, "Why-Fi?"
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His computer got a virus.
What's the different between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? Both of them can't stand up.
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
Yo mama so dumb, when the doctor told her she had coronavirus, she bought a new laptop.
This is not a joke. Stop online dating.