Technology

Technology jokes

Lie

One day my ex-best friend lied about his computer dying when he left the call and watched YouTube.

Memes

Computer

I was using my computer one time and I pressed Ctrl-Alt-Delete, and Stephen Hawking went into a deep sleep.

Orphan

Why can’t orphans build computers?

They don’t know where to put the motherboard.

Microwave

Q: What does a microwave and an M1 Garand have in common?

A: They both go “ping” when they’re done.

Ted Danson

What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!

What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!

What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!

What does a baby computer call his father? Data!

What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!

Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!

Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!

How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”

Password

*Enter password*

"ScoobyDoo"

"Password must contain special character."

"ScoobyDooFeaturingBatman"

Mom

Your mom is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing.