Technology jokes

Science flies you to the moon, while religion flies you into two towers.

Why couldn't an orphan use a fighter jet?

Because he couldn't use the homing missiles.

Me: Hey, do you wanna hear a joke?

Friend: Sure.

Me: Why don't churches have WiFi?

Friend: Why?

Me: They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.

I like my girls like my file systems...

FAT and 16.

What is the difference between shroud and a shroud imposter?

Shroud uses reddit, and the imposter uses WJE.

Reddit king and q, I really dgaf what you say, you guys are practically obsessed with me cuz ur leaving hate comments on almost all my jokes, so stop. You're obviously gonna look bad if you just insult meh jokes.

If you guys dont like my jokes, you can just dislike and not leave a comment, ok?

Me: I been up all night, no sleep--

The lie detector I didn’t know I had: Lie.

Me: stfu! I’m just singing!

Lie detector: You literally listen to music all the time... you almost don’t even sleep!

Me: THEN WHY THE FUCK DID TOU SAY IT’S A LIE, WHEN I SAID I DIDN’T SLEEP?!

Lie detector: It’s 3:00 AM in 8 minutes, you usually close your eyes to sleep when it’s 5:00 AM... You get waken up at 7:00 AM... you only sleep two hours......

Science took us to the moon, and religion took us into a skyscraper.

I thought of telling my teachers that I am transgender so I get to wear my AirPods in class.

Me: Are you an orphan?

Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?

Me: Where's your parents?

Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?

Me: Because it has a home button.

What happens when you search nudes on my phone?

Nothing, I don't have any.

Add me on Xbox Live: ironstriker1316.

Where did Stephen Hawking go when he wanted to get drunk? The Genius Bar.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

He lost WiFi connection.

Stephen Hawking forgot the WiFi password.

What’s the difference between a computer and Paul Walker? I give a crap when my computer crashes.

I go balls deep in your mum with no power.

Hey Explain bear, how would you like to be replaced by #ExplainNibbles the hamster AI?

POV: Your grandma is on life support. I would unplug her life support to charge my third phone.

I knew a girl that died from having phone sex... He died of hearing aids.

What do Ethiopian people have better than Australians?

Internet.