Technology jokes
How did Steven Hawking die?
He forgot his log on password.
I will remember my classmate's last words: "Ahh, my pen's ink spilled on my computer!"
Where do you take Stephen Hawking: to the hospital, or PC World?
Did you know that Stephen Hawking's death was an accident because he pressed "shut down" instead of "sleep mode?"
Pop-up. P
How did the inkjet printer kill himself?
He drank cyan-ide.
Computers are females because when they're down, you always charge her.
Remember 2000? It was scary.
A husband got a message from his neighbor one day. It read, "Hey, I'm sorry I had to tell you like this but I have been doing your wife for months now." The husband went to go grab his gun and shot his wife. He hid the evidence and a few hours later he got another message from his neighbor saying, "Sorry, meant using your wifi."
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
Oops!
Facial detection? More like racial detection.
Your mom is so fat the space shuttle can see her from 10,000 miles away.
What do 15-year-old boys and washing machines have in common?
They both like keeping one sock for themselves.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite snake?
Microchips.
My Grandpa said, “Your generation relies too much on technology!” I replied, “We'll see about that.” Then I unplugged his life support.
I made a website for orphans, unfortunately it doesn’t have a homepage.
When you unplug the charger to charge your phone, but you realize it was plugged into your grandpa's life support:
Do you think Stephen Hawking could ever plug his Instagram or anything?
Pro marriage tip: Let your wife know you’re all about women’s rights. There’s no reason she needs to talk that much; it’s not like replying to her is voice activated.
What was Stephen Hawking's last message before he died: "Server shutting down."