Technology

Technology Jokes

Band

I started a band called 999 megabytes... we still haven't gotten a gig.

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  • Difference

    What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?

    I don't know, I'm just the drone pilot.

    Accent

    I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.

    Depression

    Why are we depressed? Is it because of that bully in your school, or because you have acne? How about when you listen to your sad song playlist? Maybe it's because you have no friends? Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake? T^T

    Bar Code

    Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?

    A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!

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  • Disabled

    What is the first thing the disabled download on iTunes?

    "They see me rolling, they hatin'."

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  • Computer

    When you're working in the Twin Towers and your computer connects to the airplane wifi.

    Life Support

    My father said I'm too reliant on technology.

    I called him a hypocrite, and unplugged his life support.

    Sperm

    How can you tell if a heterosexual man has been using the computer?

    There is sperm on the computer screen.

    Pentagon

    The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ...

    so Trump can't tweet it.

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  • Computer

    The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

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  • Computer

    What do computers and white kids have in common? They don't have trouble shooting.