Suicide jokes
Why did Hitler kill himself? He knew the war was over at the beginning.
A pornstar committed suicide; her coworkers must be taking it hard.
DEEZ NUTS!
Why did Aaron slit his wrists?
Because it's him.
Is laughing a problem?
Laughing at what?
I want to jump.
Jump—what?
Jump off the hook.
My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.
My dad killed himself because he was Hitler.
What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.
To those who are dead now, was it fun?
My life.
"Sing in music lesson"
"I want to die, I want to die, I want to choke myself, break my neck and die."
Why did the liberal cross the road?
(Ah, fuck this shit, I'm gonna kill myself!)
Hugging Leo is a great way to commit suicide... you’d just drown in all her fatness.
How do you win an argument against an emo kid?
Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.
Wait, that's me.
Hi, I'm Depraashin.
Hi, I'm rope. May I hang with you guys?
No joke.
An orphan was shocked, he called the ambulance. If he forgot he's suicidal, he quickly hung up.
"Kill yourself. Stop thinking whether or not to do it, you dumb fucking cunt, no one likes you. Jump off a fucking 3 story building, bitch."
Are you a rope? Cause I'm tryna put you around my neck 😏
An apple and an emo kid fell from a tree, which one hit the ground?
The apple, because the rope caught the emo kid.