Suicide

Suicide jokes

Daughter

My Mom said, "I have a daughter that killed herself for getting bullied."

Well, I said, "Have you seen her?"

Ego

If I wanted to kill myself, I'd climb your ego and jump to your IQ.

Emo

Did the leaf or the emo fall out of the tree? The leaf won. The rope stopped the emo.

Rope

How do u get a depressed person out of a tree?

You cut the rope they hung themself in...

Hitler

Why did Hitler kill himself? He knew the war was over at the beginning.

Problem

Is laughing a problem?

Laughing at what?

I want to jump.

Jump—what?

Jump off the hook.

Mom

My mom said she would miss me if I committed suicide, so we made it double.

Day

What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.

To those who are dead now, was it fun?

Death

"Sing in music lesson"

"I want to die, I want to die, I want to choke myself, break my neck and die."

Emo kid

How do you win an argument against an emo kid?

Give him a gun, he'll just shoot himself.

Way

Hugging Leo is a great way to commit suicide... you’d just drown in all her fatness.

Orphan

An orphan was shocked, he called the ambulance. If he forgot he's suicidal, he quickly hung up.