Suicide jokes
I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.
Say what you want about Hitler, he wasn't all that bad. After all, he killed Hitler.
You're so ugly that if you looked in the mirror, you would walk into the light.
What's the difference between a suicide bomber and your mom?
A suicide bomber doesn't abort their mission like your mom did when she had you.
Why did the emo kid try [to] high five the tree?
So it can hang him.
Wow, didn't know little Jhony jokes were so dark. Well, but what do you expect from a site with jokes about suicide, sex, and drugs? :-)
"Drugs?????" His eyes popped out. Well, I don't really know if there actually are-- and the exact ones... But there's so many kinds of jokes-- even chin jokes. :^))
And slice jokes!
What kind of "slices"?
Handy ones. ^_^
What happened when the emo kid tried to high 5 a tree?
It left him hanging.
I wish my grass was edgy...
then it would cut itself...
I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?
They both hang from trees.
What has more brains than Kurt Cobain?
The wall behind him.
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
What do you not want to do when it comes to giving an emo a job?
Showing them the ropes.
What's one thing you should never ask a suicidal person? "Are you okay?" because the next day they'll either be dead or have a lot more cuts than they started with.
To those who are dead now, was it fun?
I ate the Emo Emo no Mi from One Piece. It gave me the powers of black hair, depression, and suicidal thoughts.
Dad: I heard an actor killed themselves with a knife. It was Reese something.
Mom: Witherspoon.
Dad: No, with a knife, you dummy!
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
How do you get an emo out of the tree?
You cut the rope.
Are you a toaster? 'Cause I wanna take a bath with you.
Are you a knife? 'Cause you make me wanna KMS.
Are you a painting? 'Cause I hang you.
Are you the flu? 'Cause you make me wanna hurl.
Are you a newspaper? 'Cause you have new problems every day.
Are you the ground? 'Cause I'm six feet deep in you ;)
I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.