Street

Street Jokes

Run

I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.

Orphan

A man was on the street and went up to a kid wearing rags. The man asked, "Hey, are you an orphan?"

The kid said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

The man said, "Your parents."

Leper

Two lepers meet on the street.

First says "How are you doing?"

Second says "Mustn't crumble!"

Car

I was driving a car and a fat person was crossing the street. When I swerved my car to miss her, I ran out of gas.

Keyboard

What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?

Organ harvesting.

Country

I'd love to move to a country ruled by Scott Stapp of Creed. Not only is it a place with golden streets, but it also welcomes people of all kinds with arms wide open.

Orphanage

I saw a little boy playing alone in the street. I told him that was a bad idea, then asked for his parents.

God, orphanages are fun to work at!!

Hormone

So, little Johnny is walking down the street and asks a stranger, "Sir, what are hormones?"

Then the man replies, "The moans of a fucking whore!"

Orgasm

Can you imagine The Count from Sesame Street having sex? "1 orgasm..., 2 orgasm..., 3 orgasm..., ah ah ah!"

Boob

Sally had 69 boobs, which was 222 many, 69,222. So she went to the doctor on 51st street, 69,222,51, who gave her pills. She took them 8 times a day, and now she is boobless.

Chicken

Why’d the chicken cross the road?

To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!

“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”

Orphan

Why do the orphans love going to the bakery down the street so much? Because their cookies are homemade.

Rape

Rape is no laughing matter. The reason why women are not believed in rape is because of you mother fucking shitbirds with no future who will become drunkards and drug dealers who go broke and live on the street getting hit by a fucking car. Fuck all of you sadists who think this kind of shit is funny, well shut the fuck up. Go jump off a bridge or get hit by car and I hope you fucking sickos die.

Stop rape. Stop rappe. Stop rapibg innocent children and women and men. I am done with rape. I am done with it!

Fat

You are so fat you were able to occupy Wall Street all by yourself.

Captain

You: "Captain, where is this plane going?"

Captain: "New York, 175 Greenwich Street."