Street jokes

How many Bay Street bankers does it take to change a light bulb?

In Toronto? One to hold it up and expect the entire country to revolve around them.

Two men are walking down the street and see a dog licking its balls. One man says, "I wish I could do that." The other one says, "You can probably just pet him."

Tork Poettschke & Jack London walk down the street together. One asks the other, "May I stand in the middle?"

You will find Taylor Swift on the streets before you find your hairline.

I'm a proud racist. I love kart racing, street racing. Any kind will do.

When prostitutes misbehave, do their pimps make them stand out on the corner with a "For Rent" sign on their crotch?

Trump cut funding for Sesame Street.

I think he's jealous that the characters on Sesame Street can count to 10.

How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?

Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...

🎵 BEAVER BEAVER 🎵

LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA

I'm walking down the street with a bag of dildos, beryllium, and a butt plug.

I asked a black man on the street if a white person paints their face black, it’s considered racist, but if a black person paints their face white, will the cops treat them better?

Why was the snowman smiling?

Because he saw the snow blower coming down the street.

A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."

He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."

He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."

He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"

The woman was thinking she wanted to have sex, but one second later, she did it on the street with a criminal.

I am so disappointed in this race.

Brown skinned street shitters, goddamn, the lowest of the low southeast Asians, lazy monkey pig-dog duck fetus eating rice brainlets always on their phones, no IQ, ugly, uncivilized untermensch subhumans.

Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.

So I sold them.

What do orphans and garbage have in common?

They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.

Yo Mama's so fat... whilst she was walking the streets of London, she accidentally bumped into someone, and that someone yelled, "Stupid American!"

Why did the rapper apologize to the sidewalk?

He didn’t mean to SPIT that hard.

Why don't rappers ever get lost?

Because they always follow the street signs.

Why did the rapper cross the road?

To drop some STREET KNOWLEDGE on the other side.