Street jokes
You will find Taylor Swift on the streets before you find your hairline.
I'm a proud racist. I love kart racing, street racing. Any kind will do.
When prostitutes misbehave, do their pimps make them stand out on the corner with a "For Rent" sign on their crotch?
Trump cut funding for Sesame Street.
I think he's jealous that the characters on Sesame Street can count to 10.
How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?
Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...
🎵 BEAVER BEAVER 🎵
LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA LUBA
I'm walking down the street with a bag of dildos, beryllium, and a butt plug.
I asked a black man on the street if a white person paints their face black, it’s considered racist, but if a black person paints their face white, will the cops treat them better?
Why was the snowman smiling?
Because he saw the snow blower coming down the street.
A guy is walking down the street when he almost steps in something. He looks down and says, "Looks like shit."
He crouches down and smells it, "Smells like shit."
He sticks his finger in, tastes it, "Tastes like shit."
He then smiles and says, "Well, good thing I didn't step on it!"
The woman was thinking she wanted to have sex, but one second later, she did it on the street with a criminal.
I am so disappointed in this race.
Brown skinned street shitters, goddamn, the lowest of the low southeast Asians, lazy monkey pig-dog duck fetus eating rice brainlets always on their phones, no IQ, ugly, uncivilized untermensch subhumans.
Yesterday, there was a blackout on my street.
So I sold them.
What do orphans and garbage have in common?
They’re both in the street, and no one wants to pick them up.
Yo Mama's so fat... whilst she was walking the streets of London, she accidentally bumped into someone, and that someone yelled, "Stupid American!"
Why did the rapper apologize to the sidewalk?
He didn’t mean to SPIT that hard.
Why don't rappers ever get lost?
Because they always follow the street signs.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To drop some STREET KNOWLEDGE on the other side.
I was walking down the street and I punched a white guy, then I was arrested for assault. The next day after I got out, I punched a black guy and I was arrested for impersonating a police officer.
A bus full of ugly people is driving down the street. The bus crashes and everyone goes to heaven. They see Saint Peter, and he feels bad for them and grants them one wish before they go into heaven. The first one says, "I wish to be attractive." The second one says the same.
Meanwhile, the 3rd person in line is giggling and snickering and laughing while Saint Peter is granting wishes. Curiously, he asks why he is laughing. He says, "I was going to wish that they turned ugly again."
A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?
I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.