Strategy jokes
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.
What do women and chess have in common? When you sacrifice the females and replace them, you are more likely to win.
If at first you don't succeed, cheat.
Why doesn’t the US want to play chess with the UK?
The US is already down 2 towers, and the UK has an unkillable queen.
Why is America bad at chess? We already lost two towers.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They ain’t got no home to run to.
Why can’t England people play chess? They ain’t got no queen.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
When a clock goes forward, it's tic-tac, but when Rommel goes backwards, it's tactic!
"You may not rest, there are monsters nearby."
-Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Why are Americans bad at Clash of Clans?
Because they’ve already lost 2 towers.
North Korea and the Martians were fighting about who was going to reach Venus first.
Trump steps in and says, "That doesn't matter, America is going to land on the sun first."
The Martians and North Korea said, "You can't land on the sun, it's too hot and you will die."
Trump said his brilliant plan, "America is going to land there at night."
How did the Shaggy defense become successful for JD Vance?
He was not banging on the sofa. Rather, he was banging the sofa!
I bet China can be the best baseball team. They took out the entire world with just a bat.
Being the first to move in chess.
It’s a white privilege.
The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.
Hey Gwen come on let's chat! We can forget about that dumb bitch "prince" and focus on us!
How can a prostitute make more money than a drug dealer?
She can clean her crack and sell it again.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
How do you beat Lady Gaga at Texas hold’em?
Poker face.
What were the terrorist of 9/11 thinking?
We can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we'll have to go through it.