Strategy jokes
I was voting for Trump in the 2016 election. It's been a while since the last presidential assassination...
"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."
- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*
How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
Do you play COC?
Because it’s a pretty good game.
Do you want to know the most racist game? Chess. You wanna know why? Because they never let black go first. I wonder why... lmao.
"If two sides in a battlefield read my book, there will be no winner."
Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
I played Clash of Clans, and when I requested troops, all I got were some Muslim wall breakers.
This chess game against America and England is getting interesting. First, America lost both of its towers, but now England has lost its queen.
When you have a hand clock it goes tic-tac.
When an American has it go backwards, it's tactic.
The first time you have to do a full body workout in chess.
Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?
Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.
How to escape your black school teacher in detention?
(Easy)
Turn off the lights!
Terrorist: We can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
Chess board White: right Black: left Yellow: invading
I heard P. Diddy got a job as a defensive coordinator.
He’s used to penetrating aggressively.
Why can’t Americans play chess?
They lost 2 towers.
What do you call a baby on the battlefield?
Free shield!
Three boy chihuahua were hot about this girl chihuahua. She tells them, "I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence."
First dog says, "I love cheese, but liver is bland."
She replies, "Really original."
Next dog, "I love liver, but cheese makes me constipated."
She replies, "Ew, gross."
Third dog steps up, "Man, liver alone cheese mine."
Winner dog 3.
People, when your lover cheats on you, do this!
1. Start a conversation. 2. Say, "What's that smell?" 3. They will smell around. 4. Say, "OMG, it's a b****," and walk away and ignore them.