"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."
- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*
"If you want to win swiftly, camp the enemies' spawn."
- Sun Tzu
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.
What do you call a baby on the battlefield?
Free shield!
Terrorist: We can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
Why can't America play chess?
There are missing two towers.
Why do Arabs hate chess?
Because the queen is allowed to move freely.
Being the first to move in chess.
It’s a white privilege.
Why can’t Americans play chess?
They lost 2 towers.
I feel bad for all American Clash Royale players.
They always start with two towers downed.
Never hide something behind a bookshelf. It's the oldest trick in the book!
Why can't America play chess?
They're missing two towers.
Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans? Because they already lost two towers.
Why is America bad at Clash Royale?
Because they can't defend their towers.
Why are we still fighting in darkness?
"Mission failed, soldier, we will get 'em next time."
Why can't British people play chess?
Because they lost their queen.
Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?
Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.
Why is the UK bad at chess?
Because they have no queen.
Why do US suck at chess? We lost both our towers.
Why is England so good at chess? They still have their queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
"If your enemy is kicking your ass, blame it on the lag."
-- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
