Stephen Hawking jokes
Hi, Charlie, is your friend?
Why does everyone think Stephen Hawking is drunk?
Because he can't even walk.
Stephen Hawking is ALIVE!
If Stephen Hawking got into a fight, he could not stand up for himself.
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his wife changed the WiFi password, because he was having an affair with his shoulder.
I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."
What were Stephen Hawking's last words?
......
Stephen Hawking couldn't make it to Heaven because there were stairs, so he rolled down to Hell.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite lunch? Eggs and shoulders.
"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"
Why does Stephen Hawking always say he's got so many bitches?
Because he is never around Siri.
What do you call someone that looks like Stephen Hawkins and is a space head? Byron Davey.
I'm making a new movie, it's called "Veggie Tales." My star actor is Stephen Hawking.
How does Stephen Hawking compete in the hurdles?
He ducks when he gets to them.
What college can Stephen Hawking not go to? Spelman University.
If Stephen Hawking was so fucking smart, why hasn't he learned to walk yet?
The fact that "Hawkins" rhymes with "walking" and "talking," yet he could never do any of them.
It was not a hijack, it was Stephen Hawking.
What does Stephen Hawking put his food in? A microwave.