Steak jokes
My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.
How do rappers like their steaks?
With lots of SIZZLE!
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
How did Protestants perform in the 16th century? Well done.
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
Waitress: What can I get for you?
Me: I'll have a steak.
Waitress: How would you like it?
Me: Immediately!
MU, I love your joke, but I cut myself a piece of cake, pie, steak, cheesecake, and anything else I can find.
Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
Waiter: "Here you go, one medium-rare steak."
Me: "I like it well done."
Waiter: "Thanks, that means a lot!"
What does this mean? 👊🥩
Chef: “How did you enjoy your steak, sir?”
Customer: “I asked for it medium rare, but it’s well done!”
Chef: “Why thank you.”
Customer: “You don’t understand, the steak is well done!”
Chef: “Of course it is, I made it.”
An orphan is at a barbecue and is getting food. A man asks him if he wants steak or phan I ment ham.
How do lions 🦁 like their steak?
"Roar!"
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
"Oh, waiter! Waiter!"
"Yes, sir?"
"Do you have frog's legs?"
"Why, yes."
"Good. Now hop along and get me a steak!"
I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.
What did the blind man say to his dog after eating dinner?
"Just ate a tasty steak!"
Why don't cows make good policemen?
Because they refuse to go on steak-outs!
"Waiter, my steak is too skinny."
"It's a strip steak, sir."
"At these prices, it should not only strip, but sing and dance too!"