Space jokes
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Is Uranus big? Well... your anus is...
Your hairline is so big, not even a black hole can eat it!
Your mama is so fat, the Marvel Universe disappeared.
I was in my first space mission for NASA. As we were orbiting the asteroid belt, I saw a figure. I couldn’t tell who it was, but he spoke Spanish with an Argentinian accent. He said, “I’m looking for my freekicks and penalties, can you help me find them?” We then decided to aid him.
What do you call grass that grows in space?
Astro-turf.
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
What do your underwear and the Starship Enterprise have in common?
They are both concerned about “Klingons near your anus”.
What can hold anything on the moon? A crater.
How does Stephen Hawking have sex?
Enter, backspace. Enter, backspace.
A NASA scientist is sitting in a bar when a Martian walks in and orders a martini.
The NASA scientist quickly realizes he is dreaming and wakes up. He turns to his wife and tries to explain the dream, but she rolls over and ignores him because she is tired of listening to him.
The NASA scientist begins to sob because his marriage is in shambles. lmao.
What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?
A Jedi Flight.
Why did Saturn have rings?
Because God liked it so he put a ring on it.
Science took us to the moon, and religion took us into a skyscraper.
August 3rd is the moon of earth, earth, moon, earth, universe.
Why is Ronan's forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead. It also had rings.
Why is Jupiter's ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan's forehead kept it stuck in orbit.
Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy.
What’s a rapper’s favorite computer key?
The space bar... it lets them space out their rhymes!
What did one astronaut say to the other astronaut after landing on the Moon?
"Ah! And people thought we were moons!"
I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.
There were 20 people in a box. There was not mushroom.