Space jokes
Me: Name all the planets.
Other person: Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Neptune, Mercury, Uranus.
Me: Not my anus!
Where can't orphans park?
Parent child.
Jupiter
The first ever picture of a black hole got released. It sucks.
What takes up 10 parking spaces? Five female drivers.
What do Star Trek and toilet paper have in common?
Both fly around Uranus and wipe out Klingons!
Where are you right now?
Looking at a fake joke? You are a waste of time and space.
In Mia's world, where bottles and parrots meet, A whimsical symphony takes its seat.
With feathers ablaze, the parrots take flight, Their vibrant hues painting the day with delight.
Mia, a dreamer with a heart full of glee, Embraces the beauty for all to see.
Her bottles, like whispers of stories untold, Capture the magic that time cannot hold.
Each bottle, a vessel of dreams and desires, Unveiling the soul's deepest fires.
They dance in the sunlight, sparkle and gleam, A kaleidoscope of colors in Mia's dream.
Parrots, enchanting with melodies rare, Sing ballads of love, floating through the air.
Their voices, like echoes of nature's sweet call, Enchanting all hearts, big and small.
Mia, with reverence, sets the parrots free, To soar across oceans, to distant lands and seas.
In their freedom, they find their truest grace, A testament to love's boundless space.
And as Mia's bottles journey afar, They carry her dreams, like a guiding star.
Through mountains and valleys, they'll forever roam, In the hearts of dreamers, they'll always find home.
What did the bones on the moon tell the astronaut?
The cow never made it.
What kind of candy do astronauts eat in space?
Mars bars.
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
NASA = Not Africa North America. That's what NASA stands for.
What do you call people who go to space? Icetronauts lolololol hahahahah.
I was to go to space camp, but then I realized I had no space to learn.
A blonde starts a new job at a local car dealership when a wealthy gentleman comes in looking for a spacious car for his large family. The blonde is excited as she gets commission, so eagerly shows him the most expensive SUVs.
The gentleman has a good look around before saying to the blonde, "It looks perfect.... But cargo space?" To which she instantly replied, "Oh, I'm sorry, sir, car only for road."
Why can't dwarfs go to space? Because NASA is not sending monkeys into space anymore.
I can see Uranus from here, and it's mighty gassy!
Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day.
They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven.
The angel said, "Unfortunately, there's only one space in Heaven today, so I must decide which one of you will be admitted."
The Angel asked Dolly if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.
Dolly took off her top and said, "Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity."
The Angel thanked Dolly and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth, the same question.
The Queen walked over to a toilet, pulled the lever, and flushed it without saying a word.
The Angel immediately said, "OK, your Majesty, you may go into Heaven."
Dolly was outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I showed you two of God's own perfect creations, and you turned me down. She simply flushed a commode, and she got admitted to Heaven! Would you explain that to me?"
"Sorry, Dolly," said the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats a pair - no matter how big they are."
Say hi to outer space. Hi, now say how are you doing to the moon. Hi, how are you doing? Why are you wasting your time? XD lol
I have been reading this book about zero gravity. I can’t seem to put it down.