Someone's jokes
For someone to be stealing a bag of gold in Heaven, [they are] a criminal on Earth and [in] Heaven.
Someone forgot to do half the questions in the history test.
And that's what made him go down in history.
I photo bombed someone's selfie, and then they yelled, "Why would you do that? I was trying to take a family photo!"
Someone ordered pizza on a tower... A plane came.
How to know something won’t be fun:
Someone will say, "C'mon, it’ll be fun!"
I was at a funeral and made a joke. No one laughed, but someone died.
I stood on the edge of a building and someone yelled, "Do a flip!"..... and I did.
What do you say to someone being cremated? You urned it!
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society?
The Doughker.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute?
So they could finally call someone "daddy."
Why do orphans go to church?
To call someone "father."
What do you call someone that no one loves?
An orphan.
Wanna know why the plane actually crashed?
Someone turned off flight mode.
(Or a kid just turned on airplane mode.)
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
Someone in the Twin Towers ordered two pizzas, plane?
Why do orphans like being criminals?
Because then someone actually wants them.
"When someone asks for a dad joke and you send them to the orphan page."
Fineman, Einstein, and Schrodinger walked into a bar.
Fineman says, "It appears we're inside a joke."
Einstein says, "But only to an observer who saw us walk in simultaneously."
To which Schrodinger says, "If someone's looking through the window, I'm leaving!"
At least someone who is gay/Carter has someone.
When the bully says, "You're adopted," so you hit him with, "At least someone wanted me!"