Society jokes

What do a turtle and a pedophile have in common?

They both try to get there before the hair does.

One day I walk up to an emo kid. I realized he had a fresh cut, so I grab my hand and slap his wrist and told him, "I like ya cut, G!"

Why do they call it America when literally nothing is free?

So, unfortunately, I got kicked out of the library again because, for some reason, they say that books on women's rights don't go in the fantasy section.

Has anybody else noticed that out of nowhere there are always tons of people online? It's kinda trippy if I'm being honest.

How do you name a Chinese kid?

Throw a frying pan on their head, "Ching Chong!"

Why can’t a gay person walk a trail? Because a gay person can’t walk on a straight line.

You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?

Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.

Why do orphans get iPhones 11?

Because it has no home page.

My friend asked me once, "Is there any religion in the world that preaches a god who masturbates in a closed room?"

"Islam it is."

I saw a kid crying yesterday, and I asked him, "Where are your parents?" Then he started crying harder.

What has ten children crying, naked, and screaming for their parents?

My big green pedo machine.

What do you call a white kid at the back of class?

A school shooter.

My neighbor has been mad at his wife for sunbathing nude. I personally am on the fence.

If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

I got kicked out of a library for putting a book about women's rights in the fantasy section.

I love orphans, so at least they know someone loves them.

What's the difference between a dead baby in my trash can and a discarded sex toy?

...

I'm still trying to think of an answer.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple always gets picked.

I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why they were crying.

They said: "Because I lost my parents."

I said: "Let's find them."

They cried harder, so I walked out of the orphanage.