Social Interaction jokes

Give a like if I have no friends.

I thought of having a threesome, but then I realized that if I wanted to disappoint two people at one time I might as well have dinner with my parents.

What did one tampon say to the other tampon when they walked by each other on the street?

Nothing. They were both stuck up cunts!

What do you call 2 Indians on a dating website? Connect the dots.

When red do be sus, though.

What do you say to a bully?

I might not be perfect, but at least I'm not you!

What do a friend and a mouse have in common? They will both be angry if you throw bricks at them.

When the bully says, "You're adopted," so you hit him with, "At least someone wanted me!"

Me: Pretend your name is “puberty.”

Friend: Ok?

Me: I'mma hit puberty!

*hits my friend*

You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.

When I'm bored, I go into an elevator with a full duffle bag. Once people come in and the door closes, I zip open the bag a little bit and whisper to it, "I'll get you some food once we get off."

Bully: You're a loser and fat.

Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.

What happens when a depressed kid tries to give a tree a high five?

The tree leaves him hanging :)

Do you know Candice?

Nope.

Candice dick fit in your mouth.

My math teacher asked me what a liked term was. I told her I couldn't say, never experienced it.

Brojobs are like air. It's not important until you don't have any.

What's the number one pick up line at a gay bar?

"May I push your stool in?"

Can watersharky and Gwen comment on this? I need to talk to you guys.

"Hey, look at me, I'm stupid named Jordan C who won't shut up and leave Addison alone."

I was at the bar with a friend, and he said to me, "Veronica, I just stopped a rape." The bartender overheard him and had a puzzled look on his face, because he never moved. He then said, "I saw this girl walk into the bathroom, and I decided not to go."