why is america so bad at playing jenga? because they already lost two towers
Jack and Jill went up a hill
To pick some dill
Jack slid down the hill and hurt his leg of skill
And he needed a painkiller pill
I was cutting the vegetables and my mom asked how I was so skillful.
I wanted to hire a butler for my new mansion in downtown LA. As he arrived, he introduced himself and I discovered it was Ghostionel Pessi. I asked him why is he working as a butler? He told me that “ a big game is coming up so he needs to refine his bottleling skills. DAMN PESSI
Did you know that..
Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.
Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.
(Kizaru's back.)
The wine taster at an old vineyard died. A homeless guy, looking ragged and dirty, came to apply. He persuaded the manager to give him a try.
The guy was given a glass of wine. He swirled, smelled, sipped, and spit. “It's a red wine, Merlot, three years old, grown on the South Slope and matured in oak barrels,” he said. "Impressive," said the manager.
The man is given another. “Still a red wine, Cabernet, eight years old, from the Northeast slope, stored in steel vats.”
The manager was amazed. He winked at his secretary. The secretary understood and brought out a glass of urine. The drunkard tasted it and said, “It's a blond, 27 years old, three months pregnant, and if I don't get this job, I'll tell who the father is!”
life is karma... because I was born god gifted me with socially awkwardness, $#!t athletic skills, and stupidity
I was the manager at a McDonald’s in Turin when I saw Penaldo walk in and submit a job application, I asked him to show me his skills and experience but he just started diving and asking for pens and tapins, I was confused until Penaldo told me that’s all he knows how to do.
What do Michelangelo and Hitler have in common?
They both used their brain to paint the ceiling.
A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said, "You are what we are looking for, but I need to test your skills." He hands her a pen. He said, "Sell me this pen." She puts it between her boobs.
After 40 years, Kobe finally learned to pass.
Why is the eagle a bird with many skills? Because it’s talon-ted!!
Someone asked me if I've ever tried to kill myself. I responded, "Absolutely. A few times actually. I'm just not very good at it."
My mom told me that she got a new job & I don't have to leave the house. Then my mom told all my customers are the men that live in our neighborhood Then I ask what is your job call. My mom said job hand, then I said job and or is hand job . My mom said yeah that it. My mom said I;m good at my job that why all the males are always knocking at the door.
What do you call an expert fisherman?
A "MASTER-BAITER".
Some people can juggle chainsaws. Chuck Norris can juggle people juggling chainsaws.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Here are some skeleton jokes You know the average person tries to hard and works himself to the bone If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone i can give you a real humerous joke I used to play the trumpet now i play the xylo-bone im always happy nothing gets under my skin I made you some turkey for lunch Bone appetit Im glad i had you im no longer bonely Ive got a skele-ton of more jokes but i'm just giving you one more Did you hear about the skeleton ninja he was very skullful (skillful)
My ex still misses me... But her aim is getting better every time!
It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
