Short jokes
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?
The Royal Commission.
Alternatively, Tony Abbott.
"Fuckin blakfellas be drunk all the time," slurred Barry McKenzie over his tenth pint of guiness.
What's the difference between a gun and a penis?
The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.
Hitler only wanted peace.
A piece of Poland, a piece of Czechoslovakia, and a piece of Turkey.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
I could tell a joke right now, but it's too dark.
What’s a zebra? A few sizes bigger than an A.
The emo girl in my class did her photosynthesis project on a tree. Little did she know that would be her demise later on.
I make weed disappear, what's your superpower?
How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.
What did the full glass say to the empty glass? "You look drunk!"
+1 like = 1 kid in my basement.
+1 follower = 1 kid in my Microwave.
+1 Comet.
Follow for candy, kids.
Like for pizza, kids.
Comment for kids.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War