Short jokes
I'd make a joke about the chin bones, but y'all couldn't mandle it.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
How do you keep a bull from charging?
You take its credit card away.
Where would the next Formula race happen?
Answer: On your flat chest.
I wish death was in the form of a woman.
That way, it would never come for me.
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
Having sex while camping is fucking in tents (intense).
Are you a lightbulb, cuz you brighten up my day?
Idiot 1: Why are cows good in math?
Idiot 2: I don't know why.
Idiot 1: Because they have built-in cowculators!
What does a queen want on her cookie?
Royal Icing.
Throw a plate.
It’s broken, right?
Say “sorry” to it.
Did it fix back?
No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)
If you drop something, make your short friend get it.
I have a friend called Jakob and asked him, "Where my crackers are?"
Can we stop talking about 9/11? I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot.
What's better than throwing up a stillborn?
Making your wife eat it again.
What do cows call money?
Moola.
Hears a clean joke: My horse got muddy, so I gave him a bubble bath.
Now hears a dirty joke: Bubbles is the horse next door.
Why do emo kids not jump?
They're still in the sky.