Short jokes
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.
They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
A Thai woman ran into a wall. What does she break?
Her boner.
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
What is the difference between a broom and a mop?
It’s hard to beat my girlfriend when she’s holding the mop.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
Your mom is so stupid that she thought LGBTQ was a sandwich.
Your mom is so dumb that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
What do you do to a deaf girl after you’re done fucking her?
Break her fingers so she can’t tell anyone.
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
Sparkling water was invented by Germans. Who else would add gas?
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
What is a disabled person's least favorite song?
"I'm Still Standing."
My grandmother made her passage on the Titanic. The ship was not the only thing that went down.
▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
Spread the cat gun.
What do emos and ninjas both have in common? They both hide and cut things.
That one depressed friend.
Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"
The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"
What happens if you inhale too much nitrous oxide (laughing gas)?
You die of laughter.