Short jokes
I told an orphan that I watch Family Guy, and he seemed disappointed, so I reminded him that he has no family.
Been getting a lot of paper cuts on my fingers lately, I guess it's a sign I should go lower.
What do Jesus and I have in common?
No one knows my real bday either.
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
Two friends were hanging out with each other next to a tree.
Too bad only one was standing. :)
When Cincinnati played Alabama in 2021, they wore black at their funeral! 🤣
"Freshfry, please leave me and prince alone! I never asked you to join our chat!"
What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!
Step on your small sister's foot, she will always open her mouth like a dustbin.
If chickens make chicken nuggies, does that mean dinosaur chickens make Dino nuggies?!?
CONSPIRACY!!!
Why did the orphan join the baseball team?
Because he knew when he got to third base he could head home.
I should name my dog Ariana Grande.
That way I could say that I fucked Ariana Grande.
Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.
Me: I'm afraid of random letters.
Therapist: You are?
Me: [screams]
Therapist: Oh, I see.
Me: [screaming intensifies]
With great depression comes great antidepressants.
What do you call a downy who can't get a girlfriend?
Down bad.
It's a grave mistake to talk badly about the death.
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
How do emos fly? They hang themselves.
Why do you not have milk with your Oreos?
Daddy never came back with the milk.