Short jokes
"Sir, in court, all your answers must be oral, okay?"
"Ok."
"What town did you grow up in?"
"Oral."
Your forehead is so big that babies can use it as a full-sized football pitch!
Why do sisters hate you?
Because you're their favorite stepbrother :P
Who is going to start the robot takeover? Me.
Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.
Them: You're ugly.
Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
What's the difference between $1 million and baby teeth?
I don't have $1 million in my wallet.
Why do Americans always win at the shooting Olympics?
Because they train at the best school.
How did the guy greet his wife?
"Howdy, sister!"
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Your Boyfriend.
Your Boyfriend who?
Your Boyfriend who doesn’t love you! Bye!
So you're saying a penny is worth more than a penny?
That don't make no cents.
Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.
Stop it! What if a blind person sa- oh wait, never mind, carry on.
What show do gay men watch?
"2 and a Half Men!"
Lol at this one fellas!
Man: How tall is a penguin?
Bartender: About three foot, why?
Man: Oh shit, the Bible-bashing nuns! I fucking hit one!
Poor car.
What does a bar fly and a necrophiliac have in common?
They both enjoy a cold one once in a while.
I am the joke.
How do you put "blonde" and "duh" in the same sentence? Just say, "Blondes are dumb."
Why is Uranus so big? Because you discovered it.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You're welcome.