There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
Short Jokes
What happens when a furry takes over Nazi Germany?
The Furred Reich.
Roses are red... Violets are blue... I feel like I'm gonna get raped next to you.
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
Be careful, everybody, I have a red dot on my forehead, so I can record everybody!
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an emo bitch?
The Twin Towers hit the ground.
Where do rape victims buy their clothes from?
The kids section.
Why isn’t the word “orphan” spelled with an “f” instead of “ph?” Because that “f” stands for “family,” and the word “orphan” doesn’t have a family.
Wanna know how I got away from Iraq? Iran.
I just got a job at the prison library.
It has its prose and cons.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Cakatoo."
"Cakatoo who?"
"So, you're a Rooster now?"
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it had its ion someone else.
People shouldn’t be afraid during a zombie apocalypse.
They can stay in their living room.
What did the emo say before he crossed the road?
"Fuck my life."
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
Because he lost his filling.
Why did the grandmother put wheels on her rocking chair?
... she likes to rock and roll lol.
What do you get when you cross a shark and a snowman?
Frostbite!
Teacher: Take a seat, class.
Wheelchair person: I've been in the seat.
I remember my uncle's last words:
"I don't think we're going shooting today."
