Short jokes
What’s a pedophile’s favorite band? Kids Bop.
Why is it bad to climb a tree?
You might fall on an orphan! 🫥
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
Why doesn't Adele swim properly?
Because she's rolling in the deep. 🤽♂️
What do you call a lady with a pyramid on her head?
mummy
How do homeless people move where they're living?
They pick up their box and walk away.
You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...
Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
I have a little John.
My biggest joke: I’d show you, but I don’t have a mirror to show you.
What's overcrowded and uncomfortable?
My mind.
What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner? A kong-vict.
Why do blondes make bad bank robbers?
Because they tie up the safe and blow the guards.
What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow?
A holy cow!
What show do orphans never watch?
"Fuller House."
What do bees like with sushi?
Wasabee.
Money and women are kind of the same thing for me; it comes and goes very easily.
George Floyd was in a TV show, Fresh Prince, with no air.
I broke up with my RBLX gf, and I heard my uncle crying in the other room.
Guys, say "I love gape horn" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.