Short jokes
Why are Asians so bad at baseball? ... Because they ate the bat!
What is old, cold, and alone?
An orphan's parents.
Bleach solves so many problems: stains, dirty dishes, messes, and overpopulation.
What's the worst TV series for orphans?
Family Guy.
What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Hey dude, can you spell IHOP?
Sure, man. I. H. O. P.
Wait, you ate my pee!!!
What did the Taliban say to the Afghan?
Nothing, they blew him up.
What was the first thing Thanos snapped?
Loki’s neck.
What does Joe Biden call a room full of kids? A toy room.
What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?
The apple... the emo just hangs there.
Neither of them respect boundaries.
What did Joe Biden say when he got pulled over?
I'm just a-Biden the law, officer.
Tell an old person to pretend [they are] shaking salt in their mouth... you'll see!
I was trying to hang the lights when I accidentally kicked the chair.
Why can't orphans really play baseball?
Because when they do, all the other kids tell that joke that everyone has heard more than 50 times.
For a present on Christmas, I gave an orphan a phone, just without a home button.
I am never wrong. One time I thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken.
Don't treat her like a gold pump when she's treating you like a gray pistol. Put down a launch pad and rotate.
Why were there so many victims in the Grenfell flat fire disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.