Short jokes
Hi, I am Michael Jackson, pronouns are HEE/HEE!
There's a girl I like in my school, but she's always on her phone. It seems that I can't get a SIGNAL from her.
The FBI said, "Open up!" I shout to them.
A person said, "Cookie sale." I opened up. He fucked me.
Yo mama is so fat, she couldn't even fit through the rabbit hole at first because she ate like a damn pig last night when we had dinner.
Why is Hitler better than Biden?
Because Hitler gave his people gas for free.
What kind of trumpet are you playing?
An "Donald Trumpet"!
NASA stands for naughty aliens spewing apricots.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!
Why did the astronauts take a box of cereal and a cow with them? In case they bypassed the Milky Way!
Last week a girl asked me for sex. I had to disappoint her… so I said yes.
I troll under different usernames. I'm a bit all over the place mentally.
What did Osama give the Windows on the World restaurant in the WTC as a rating when he ate it? A 9/11!
Why is a cabbage green? Because it's in Greenland.
If you're ever bored, adopt an orphan. What is he going to do, be kissed by Vedanta?
Joke 1# "Knock, knock." Who's there? "Pastur." Pastur who? "Past ur bedtime."
Joke 2# Why does a slug always win a race? Because its components always stop for a break.
Joke 3# Your momma's so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number."
If an emo kid takes an over-the-counter medication, will they be happy?
Me: What’s the definition of “ignorance”?
Friend: Don’t know?
Me: U STUPID!
What commitment does a pimp make to each new hoe he turns out?
Answer: He will always be there for her after the break-in period.
Why was the chicken black and the other were white? Adoption!