Once there were twins, Mark and Michael, Mark was the owner of a old boat. It so happened that Michael's wife died the same day that Mark's boat sank. A few days later, a kindly old woman saw Mark and mistook him for Michael. She said, "I'm sorry to hear about your loss. You must just feel terrible. "Mark, thinking that she was talking about his boat, said, "Heck no. In fact, I'm sort of glad to be rid of her. She was a rotten old thing right from the beginning. Her bottom was all shrivelled up and she smelled like old dead fish. She was always losing her water; she had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too. Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy. I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to these four guys looking for a good time. I warned them that she wasn't very good, but they wanted to use her anyhow. The fools tried to get in her all at once and she split right up the middle!" The old lady fainted. 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂
What's the difference between a Catholic hospital and Michael Jackson's Children's Hospital?
No seriously, what is it?
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap
You have a great singer inside you
What does Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common? Firstly, they both went from black to white and secondly they both get turned on by kids.
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
During a phone call:
"Hey, is Michael Jackson in Miami with his manager?"
"Actually, he's off to Tampa with the kids."
Did you hear about Johnny Depp's shelter for abused women? It's going as well as Michael Jackson's children's hospital!
What do K-mart and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have boys pants half off.
What's bigger than the Milky Way?
Michael Jackson's nose
Why did Michael Jackson rush to Walmart?
He heard boys pants were half off!
What's Michael Jackson's favourite thing to do on guitar? Fingering A minor
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while we was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
What does Michael Jackson like about 28yr olds? There's 20 of them!
Why can’t Michael Jackson ever win in a race? Because he always comes in a little behind.
One thing that Johnny Depp and Michael Jackson love to do? Sniff on little white crack.
What did MC Hammer say to Michael Jackson?
U Can't Touch Kids
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and acne? Acne doesn't come on a 5 year olds face
What was Michael Jackson's favorite dessert? Cream pie.
Johnny Depp, Michael Jackson, and Marilyn Manson all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Why don't you take a seat, right over there?" Turns out the bartender was Chris Hansen himself.
What do Michael Jackson and the Captain from the Spongebob theme song have in common? They both say "are you ready kids?"