Why did Ten need a therapist? He was in between 9/11.
Short Jokes
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.
I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.
What do you call a U.S. border hopper?
A Mexican jumping bean.
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
Me: Do you eat your cereal with water? You: No, why? Me: 'Cause your dad never came back with the milk!
Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?
Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.
His name is Donald, but he looks like Goofy.
Why are people from New York so bad at chess?
Because they quickly lose two towers (rooks).
What record did Obama prove during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he'll still be in government housing.
You're so bald that your hairline is receding faster than my bank account after a trip to Las Vegas.
Why should you keep English gay activists away from neo-nazis?
British cigarettes get smoked easily.
I guess making 9/11 jokes at the airport is better than shouting "He's got a gun!" at the airport.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house looks like.
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
What did the cow say to the leather chair?
“Hi Mom!”
I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store. I told him, “I don’t think they have what you’re looking for, sir.”
What's the LGBTQ+'s favorite cereal?
Fruity Pebbles.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop FIRE TRACKS.
Emma Watson gets hotter and hotter in the Harry Potter movies when you’re watching in reverse order.
