Short jokes
Crack me, break me, love me, and you ate me--egg.
What's a cat's favorite color? Purrrple!
What does a lawyer defending a killer and a password have in common? They're case sensitive.
Why did the kid cry?
His dad didn't get the milk.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue. You rescue them, rehabilitate them, then sell them for as much as possible.
When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."
Where does a French cat live?
- In Purr-is
OR
- In the Catacombs
OR
- In a chat-eau.
Q: What is a Karen called in Europe?
A: An American.
I can't fake the smile for long, as there is weight hanging at both of its ends called depression.
Your mom is heavier than Mariah can even carry.
Welcome to the Fast Food Divorce Center where yesterday's lies are today's fries.
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.
A blonde drops off her dress to the dry cleaners.
The lady says, "Come again!"
The blonde says, "No, it's toothpaste this time."
What do you call a deer who is funny?
Diraleous.
"When your mom is pregnant and your best friend learns dad jokes."
Me:.....
Yo, Bloon... what bitch where the fuck my child support camo Bloon? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why was everybody so tired on April 1st? Because they just finished a March of 31 days!
Your forehead is so big, you can fit Santa’s sack on it.
You look like the 0.01 percent of germs the Lysol didn't kill.
Why did the Dad cross the road?
To get the milk.