Short jokes
Can't wait for Stephen Hawking's next update.
Why aren't orphans scared of getting in trouble at school?
Because they can't call their parents.
Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.
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My son came up to me and said, "Mom, where are your parents?"
I stared in confusion. I said, "In a far place."
He asked, "In an orphanage?"
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
Why am I so successful?
When I was told to go big or go home, I only had one option.
What do you call a bunch of llamas?
Alpaca llama.
What is the funniest hill in the world called? Hill-arious!
Why do orphans hate going to Costco? Because they need a parent to get samples.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home.
Are you a fire alarm because you're loud and annoying?
I did not.
What's yellow all over and can't swim?
A school bus full of children.
Man, I’m so sorry that Stephen Hawking is dead; he was such a good person.
Too bad it’s a staircase to Heaven and not a ramp.
What did the orphan say to the parent?
Oh, wait!
Hi 👋 magic school 🏫.
When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.
Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!
Today there was a line to punch me.
Yeah, that was the punch line.