Short jokes
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me:...
Me: Bitch, please.
What did they give Elmo before he left the factory? Two test-tickles.
Why does Sans say "I got a bone to pick with you?"
Because he needs to pick your balls.
Orphans don't like family sized chips, I wonder why.
Why does Batman cover half of his face? To let the police know that he's white.
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
In the bus, you can't spell "black" without "back."
What's the quickest way to get money besides winning the lottery?
Leaving your son with Michael Jackson.
What’s the best way to get people to remember your birthday? Kill yourself.
What is an orphan's favorite game? Sims, so they can make a family to have.
in can re;ate to this its always going through my mind
What did the plane say to the tower?
"Give me a kiss."
Virginia is false advertising. Couldn't find many virgins there.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Di.
Di who?
See, easily forgotten.
You look nice, and you seem like good fun, so if I give you this flower, will you finger my bum?
Pick a number, syckkkkkkk, that’s the wrong number.
What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
All these jokes really hijacking my mind.
Finally, some social platform where you can talk about Muslims and not get bombed.
Obv, unless you share your residence.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.