Short jokes
What makes a healthy normal man different to a disabled man?
"They can move it, move it." (from King Julian)
I know an orphan named Zara, and he has never had homemade food.
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
What do you call a non-binary person that is lactose intolerant?
Non-buy dairy.
Asians love it when a British person says "Rice!"
There are only 2 genders: if you have a dick, or a pussy.
Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night, she’s back in bed.
Does Eminem like M\&M's? Cause if he didn't, that would be like "they're" not liking "there."
What makes a 360 no-scope and JFK's assassination similar?
Both were some of the greatest achievements in history to achieve.
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!
Fat chicks be like, "Am I fox pretty, bunny pretty, cat pretty, or deer pretty?" Like none, bitch, you elephant pretty. 😭😭😭
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.
You call your dad the sun because he is 90 million miles away.
What is the day parents stopped fearing for their little boys? June 25, dead pedo day.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
If I was any more inbred, I'd be a sandwich.
God: You're gonna have 2 parents.
Orphan: Double it and give it to the next person.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
I ran over some crippled kids. I told [them] to walk it off!