Short jokes
Pick a number, syckkkkkkk, that’s the wrong number.
What does a cigar and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless until you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
All these jokes really hijacking my mind.
Finally, some social platform where you can talk about Muslims and not get bombed.
Obv, unless you share your residence.
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
Come, my children, to the bread cult!
What starts with a P and ends in S? (hint: men have it and women want it). Pockets.
What do you call an 18 year old orphan?
Homeless.
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
The S in America stands for safe.
Preventing suicide is best done by committing it.
Why can't people in wheelchairs be gay? Cuz you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.
Walk up to the quiet kid and tell him to hang in there. Trust me, you won’t regret it.
Q: Why do clowns always get into fights?
A: Because they have the balls to.
What’s an orphan's favorite Marvel film?
Spider-Man: Far From Home.
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
Withered Bonnie, more like Bonnie Mcnutt!
What sucks about disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.