Short jokes
I wanted another piece of pizza... but she said I could only have One Piece.
If Germany is the father land, and Russia is the mother land, would WWII just be domestic violence?
what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)
What is a ghost's favorite cake?
I scream cake!
Women suck (GET IT?!)
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
Every zodiac sign has a different hairstyle except Cancer.
I would tell a dad joke, but it already left me.
What starts with "E" and ends with "G"?
Everything.
I don't like marriage. It's just like soup, as soon as you're done spooning it, it all cools off.
(demons in my head) I laugh to meet them...
Roses are red, fishers are fishing,
I really hope you’ll be reported missing.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
My dad and I were fishing one day.
That’s where he met my stepmom.
When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.
What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!
Why is it annoying to eat by basketball players? Because they dribble all the time!
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
Philipe Philope.