Short jokes
How can toilet paper decorate your house?
Shit sticks everywhere.
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumeference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
Where were the first orange trees 🍊🌳 planted?
In Orange County.
What did the cowboy say to the girl on the beach?
"Sandy cheeks."
"And then I said, \"Knife to meet you.\""
"You stabbed my brother!"
"It's okay, I'm in stable condition!"
*sans*: Why was the skeleton depressed? Because Frisk keeps resetting and it resets when he lost his phone.
What is the biggest joke ever? Trump.
I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!
I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
What do you say to a depressed special kid?
“Why so down?”
What do you call an Indian lesbian?
Mingeeta.
Q: Why do clowns always get into fights?
A: Because they have the balls to.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
What sucks about disabled people?
They can't stand up for themselves.
Everyone likes orphans but their parents.
What is the similarity between orphans and apples?
They both get thrown out.
What's the worst thing that can happen to schools?
Quiet kids.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!