Short jokes
Why don't feminists like to eat hotdogs? Because they remind them of men's dicks.
What’s the difference between kids and drugs?
I don’t hide drugs in my basement.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it!
What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."
What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.
When her head game is so strong, she sucks the chromosome right out of you.
What did scientists prove when they saw a skeleton on the moon?
The cow didn’t make it.
Your spelling is more morbid than any of these jokes.
My sisters ask me, "Are you really a virgin?" I say, "That's nun of your business!"
Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team? Because she ran away from the ball.
I was trying to poison Santa, but he killed my dad and ate all the cookies! 😤
Here's how to piss off all of North America.
All the United States is, is South Canadia.
An Irish guy walks out of a bar....
I wish I didn't have depression because all my friends have "BBC Bitch be crazy" disease.
Does your shoe have a hole in it?
No.
Then how did you put your foot in it?
I walked up to a man, and he said, "How's the weather up there?" and then I pushed him into the street to get hit by a bus.
Where do sick boats go? The dock!
I'll always remember my Dad's last words before he died on 9/11...
Allahu Akbar!
I will never forget my girlfriend's last words... "Get off of me! STOP!" *slurp*... Dead.
What do you call a racist crow?
Jim.