Short jokes

Short jokes

Plane

Me dozing off while driving.

Everyone else on the passenger plane: September 11, 2001.

Orphan

Why did the orphan commit crimes? To know what it's like to be wanted.

Man

Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.

Cat

Q: Why did the cat get arrested?

A: He was caught littering.

Dick

When his dick is really, really small, but you pretend it is so big it hurts so you don’t make him feel bad 'cause he is a nice guy.

KFC

KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."

Kid

What do you say to a depressed special kid?

“Why so down?”

School

Dad: What did you learn in school today?

Timmy: Not enough, I guess, 'cause I gotta go back tomorrow.

Orphan

Why did the orphan try to get hurt?

Because then they would get surrounded with people who care about him.

He looks around, no one is there.

Comparison

Jesus and Satan are just basically Homer and Flanders. One tries to help the other, only for Satan to just say, "Shut up!"