Short jokes
Where do fish keep their money?
In a riverbank!
If there is a divorce in West Virginia, are they still brother and sister?
Did you know ghosts are alcoholics?
They only come out for the boos.
A girl named Sally has no arms.
"KNOCK KNOCK"
She never answered...
What body part do pigs have that humans don’t have?
A hambone.
Elmo, stop penetrating the orphan!
How do you make a builder cry?
Kill his family.
If her age is on the clock, she gets the cock.
Why is the B so cool? Because it’s in between A and C.
My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with pasta. -- I'm doing well, but I do get cannelloni.
I asked Siri why I am still single; she showed me a pic of my mom riding on my dick!
Bad Hitler puns are infuhrerating.
A wise man once told me: "If you poke the bear in prison, the bear will happily return the favor when it's time to shower."
Twinkle, twinkle little star. I hope I'll get hit by a car. I am not dead yet, I hope I'll die. I hope I'll be born to a new whole life.
What is the difference between Betty White and Paul Walker?
Betty didn’t reach 100 before she died.
The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.
Imagine Africans during a solar eclipse...
What's blue and doesn't weigh much?
Light blue.
What is the world's greatest invention? The ball gag, do you know why? Honestly, officer, I never heard her say no.
What do you call a cup with a handle?
A mug! HAHA ha... My parents just got a divorce :(